The Natural Order of Things

It's in my nature to steer clear of my comfort zone...it's not easy staying just left of centre, but how else do we become interesting, challenging individuals?

(But still I may to cling to my comfortable life)

It's in my nature not to succumb to a preconceived notion...it means I'm drawn to people from all walks of life, but they're mistrustful of my easy acceptance.

(But still I may make snap judgements and stick to them)

It's in my nature to want more from people than they ask of themselves...it's not too much, I see potential and I coax it - I don't expect from anyone what they cannot already give.

(But still I may ask too much of a potential that simply is not there)

It's in my nature to be disappointed in myself when I fail in any tiny respect, and it will haunt me until I redeem myself.

(But still I may forget my failures when I simply cannot cope)

& It's in our nature (oh, so human) to constantly contradict ourselves.
The difference lies in one's ability to recognize and fix this over another's reluctance to either see it or correct it.

(But still I do neither)

I Feel For You

Does every step we take forward have to mean we're getting farther and farther away from our roots?

It makes me wonder why some people are shut-down or stunted because they're trying to take that step...that leap forward...

What is society so afraid of?

Can they not tell the ambitious apart from the rebellious?
(Are they one and the same? Maybe ambition springs from rebellion, or is motored by it, maybe...but maybe it really is a purely positive force)

I feel for you but I don't feel with you...because I don't have that driving force (do I want that?)...there's nothing holding me back only because there's nothing pushing me forward...so kudos to your leaping mind!

Inaction...

Time flows idly by
Still I am too slow to grasp it
My fingers feel heavy
Bound back & lethargically pulling
Is this universal matter over mind? (My mind)
My mind too weak to battle
& it's easy to give up
Why pick a losing fight?
Success is a fickle mistress
Attempt after feeble attempt
Nothing but slow responses
(Or, worse still, none)
Feelings of failure
So hard to swallow
So no longer will I try.

Act Like Ya Has It (Attitude!!!)

Do your worst
Deal me that hand
I'll still come out on top

And if you doubt me
I'll prove you wrong - just try me!
Coz I'm what they call the cream of the crop

Test me, prod me, poke me, PROVOKE!
Stoke that fire & try to bring me down

Kick me, push me, pull me, SCREAM!
Who'll be left standing in the final round?

My trunk stands firm
My roots run deeper, never stop
They move and they shift and they change but they GROW...
& that's what makes me the cream of the crop

I'm not stunted, & I won't cease
And I'm always in my own head
But if that could drive me crazy
I'd be better off dead

No! I'll use it, embrace it
Abuse it and chase it
Force it then free it
Contort it and be it...

Coz honey...

I AM the cream of the crop

Blood Ties

Break my head open & release all this pain
This shit's getting old, and so are you

I said crack my head open - I can't take this - FUCK!
Make my day, turn my inner voice off

All this pounding in my head's not going away soon
& it's you, & it's me, & we're banging away
With hatchets, with hammers, until it all fades
With spiteful insults (the tools of the trade)

I want to hurt you because I'm sick of being shit on

FUCK YOU

fuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyouFUCKYOU!!!

You & I (& I...rhyme waaay too much...then break it)

You tell a lie and I...take it
You beg for my attention so I...fake it
Let's see how much longer you'll...make it
Before I decide it's time to...shake it off

You're a hack, but it intrigues me
Full of jack, but believe me
I'm more patient than I look

& I'll think twice before
I can't take any more
& finally I'll send you on your way

Stay away from me
Coz I can't pull myself out
Of this bittersweet cycle
You win - I am weak

Have some mercy on me
Coz i don't know myself now
That I've let you lead me on
For so long: so back off

Won't you just back the FUCK off?!

How about you grow a pair?
How about you decide to man-up?
How about you tell the Goddamn truth
& let me know what's what?

How about I wake up now?
How about I listen to myself?
How about I stay fucking cynical
& call you the fuck out?

Coz I know exactly what's going on
I'm done playing dumb
& if you won't stop lying to me
I'll stop lying to myself
(Before I grow quite numb)

Distrust

To hell with your mocking tone
I'm done with giving a shit

Goodbye to your brainless emotion
Embrace the most common of sense

No more of this senseless desire
Distasteful - I'm giving it up

Distrustful - it saves me my pride now
Negative...& it's eating me up

What good is my pride when I'm lonely?
So lonely: Is this growing up?