So Now You Know...

It was lonely for a day or so until one morning some man, more recently arrived than I, stopped me on the road.

“How do you get to West Egg village?” he asked helplessly.

I told him. And as I walked on I was lonely no longer. I was a guide, a pathfinder, an original settler. He had casually conferred on me the freedom of the neighborhood.

-F. Scott Fitzgerald, "The Great Gatsby"

NB: Ok, so the book sucked ass, but this passage really hit home when I read it...try and take it metaphorically, I'm sure you'll understand.

More Lyrics

A little bit dumbed down
A little more drowned out
Speak softly, child, be sweet
Don't run with aggression
& they won't rub you out!

And if suburbia wins the battle
Then suburbia wins the war
2.4 child norm
Warm suburbian home

[Come, little sheep, desperate little sheep, hungry/lost/angry little sheep - can't keep taking it out on me]

Here comes your saviour
White picket-fence teeth
Soul as pure as intentions (BLACK)
White lie infestatons
What lies beneath your smile?
Your pressed designer pants?
With your matching bag and shoes
Have you dirty little secrets?
I'm sure they're very few...

You & Your Tear-Away Morals

I realize a lot of what I write revolves around materialism, but honestly that's all I see in Amman - the dirt poor and the filthy rich - maybe it's just me...plus anyone 'middle-class' is just clinging to an image they're desperately trying to uphold...and not just the girls (but, yeah, in my mind it's mainly them)...God forbid any of them gets caught in less than their 100% fashionista clothes/make-up/hair...so here's some more shit to swallow:

Swimming in a sea of cold smiles
Their poison lipstick stains me
& I am not me...

You've seen me naked
Screaming my name
Now I am just another make-up stain
And no longer mine

Flash your pearly whites
Shake your silky hair
Be that perfect kind of fake
And appeal to the masses of YOU

Be that perfect sheep
We've all come to love
& be as dead as
We've come to expect

Excerpt (Pt. 2)

Pulling, pushing, shoving
Dragging, clawing - fighting...my way out
Another slump, another high
Another unsteady yesterday, today and tomorrow
Another reason to feel like I do
Or another excuse?

I hunger, I hurt, I bruise
I need, I want, I feel...like there's no tomorrow
Impending doom, impending disaster
Predicting the lack of a future - another 'to-be'
Predicting my sorry end
Or predicting nothing

And I want to feel loved
I want to feel full
I don't want to feel...like a used tissue
Ever again

Excerpt (Pt. 1)

Don't stand there making your excuses
You don't wear that colour well

Don't stare at me so stupidly
What the hell did you expect?

Gold! Hah!

As the pen taps the paper - not in a rush, but lethargic and waiting for a thought to arrive - my brain tries to firm and confirm one emotion, one word, but nothing arrives. Nervous about nothing and nothing to be nervous about, my nerves are unnerving - I need to let go.

A Comedic & Satiric View On University Life

.



You could put an insomniac to sleep
Bed him and bore him and kill him with speech
You absolute freak

The owls are drowsy
Your lecture is lousy
And I am in need of a pill

Cure me, sweet medicne!
Slide down my throat
Deep down to my bowels
And help me to float

Up and away
From this horrible man
From my marketing lecture
God help me, I ran!

And into the night
My glorious flight
Will save me this anguish I bear

Till the morrow, JU
Whence I shall return
For my english essay is due...